Cooking

I really do like to cook but I hate spending money on food. Living at home has been perfect because I go shopping with my mom on the weekends and pick up food that I want but don't have to buy.

I realize what a blessing my parents are to me. I mean, they are letting me stay here for free! I try my best to serve them by keeping my stuff picked up, cleaning the house, and cooking dinner or at least helping every night.

I know my parents have seen a huge change in me from my high school self to the person I am today. I want so desperately for them to realize that the change is not merely from "growing up." It is a choice that I have made to try to live my life as Jesus lived His. And I know I don't do that well all the time or even most of the time but I chose it because when the day is done, Jesus' love for me is enough. I wish my family could experience peace as I have known it. A peace which transcends all understanding.

I am hopeful that my time at home is not just a stepping stone in my life; that this year+ would be a significant time for me to share my faith with my family.

Distracted.

I had Bible study tonight and was trying to condense the 2 hour conversation into a nice blog post but...

My dog, Aspen, just got put on new medication.

This change is giving him the worst dog farts ever. I'm pretty sure gas is just freely flowing from his butt.

The smell is distracting me from any sort of intellectual thought.

Goodnight.

Opulence, I Has It.

When the guy kisses the mini giraffe, I laugh every time.

If you were to have a mini animal, what would it be?

One of my favorite animals is the walrus and I think a mini one would be super bad ass. The only draw back would be that it needs to be around water all the time, or at least that would make it most happy and I don't want the burden of providing this little guy water wherever we go.

So my final choice is a mini polar bear. Loves to swim but isn't totally dependent on water for its happiness. I would also name him Walter. Sounds fitting.

Feel free to share what mini animal you would want to have.

A Change of Pace

For the last few months I have been willing myself to be OK with the reality that I was not going on Young Life staff this fall. I wrote a few days ago about the progression of emotions ending with happy. I am finally happy where I am. And then this morning I get a phone call from a number I didn't recognize and since it was before noon, I was still sleeping. I silenced the phone call figuring that if it was important enough the caller would leave a message.

Sure enough, when I woke up, there was a voice mail waiting for me. The voice was that of Vicki. I have not met this woman but I knew she had to be great just by how loving and graceful her voice was. With that voice she told me that she was on committee with Parker YL and that they were interested in interviewing me for the Area Director position.

I didn't know how to react. Like I said, I had been forcing myself to be content with where I am and then this sweet woman dropped this huge ass bomb on me.

I called her back and set up a phone interview for later that evening, 6:30 to be exact. I called a few close friends and told them the news. I was starting to get excited.

The interview went how I expected it to go. Vicki asked me about myself, why I thought I was called for YL staff, and other self examining questions. When her questions ended mine began. Thanks to the help of Wendy, I had 2 pages of questions about the area, committee, finances, and other miscellaneous stuff. She had the answers to most of them and a few might have caught her off guard but she answered openly and honestly.

From the conversation it sounded like they are currently interviewing 4 or 5 people half were like me. Young and more of a staff associate. The others were older and would fit more of the Area Director role. They plan to make a decision on Thursday narrowing the field down to 2 for in person interviews.

Let the praying begin.

Just Another Day

So, my day started as par the usual in the burbs. Suze knocked on my door and told me that noon was a good time for me to start getting up. I grudgingly agreed mostly due to being quite hungry. Stumbling out of bed I brushed my teeth and was on the prowl for lunch. After consuming a delicious turkey sandwich I proceeded to watch some TV. 3:45 rolled around and it was time to take my older brother to work. Sat around for a bit longer then helped out my mom with dinner. A few chicken breasts and a mound of grilled veggies later I found myself just sitting around some more. I got so bored of just sitting that I went to the basement and looked through our OnDemand menu where I find some yoga instructions. Feeling a little more daring I opted for a Jillian Michaels 30min work out. I'm still tired. Luckily, my good friend Lisa was up for grabbing a beer and I spent the rest of the evening with her laughing about life in the burbs (not the blog, although she did mention that her mom read a post and laughed). I will close this day by laying in bed watching old episodes of Always Sunny in Philadelphia until I fall asleep. Not a bad day.

Marathon

Now, before you freak out, I am not going to try and run a marathon. That ship has already sailed.

I am referring to TV shows that come on in marathon form. It usually happens sometime in the week preceding the shows season opener so you can either catch up on the last season or be newly introduced to the show. If I'm being honest, I have spent days of my life lounging around watching the trashiest of TV shows in marathon form. Shows I don't even like will suck me in and convince me that there is nothing better to do than sit on the couch taking in the sights and sounds of terrible reality TV.

Today was slightly different because the marathon was of Bio's show I Survived.... I had never seen it before but tonight was the premier of its 5th season so the day was full of old episodes. It profiles anywhere between 2 and 4 people's encounters with near death experiences each episode. Some are complete accidents (car crash, stranded hiker, etc.) but most are people surviving attempted murder.

I usually don't go for shows like this. They make me a little paranoid (the fact that 2 of the stories happened in Aurora didn't help this) and I am fully aware of the Sin in the world and don't need or want to be reminded of it. It makes me physically ache just hearing about the pain and hurt in people's lives but for some reason I could not turn it off. I still don't know why but I do know that I have a new show that I will be watching every week. I will let you know if I figure out why this show is so appealing.

My New Jam

http://www.drydockbrewing.com/

I love beer and they brew it well!

Hobbies

I am in desperate need of some hobbies.

I knew that the burbs were going to be a lot more boring than a college town but I'm not quite sure I was ready for this level of mundane.

I have already started doing yoga in the mornings. Well, today was my first day and i like the stretching but could do without the awkward semi spiritual talk. I'm going to mute it and listen to something else.

I also bought my first house plant. We could argue about whether this is a hobby or not but I'm counting it.

So, I've got two things that take up about an hour of time (max) each day. Which leaves me with about 12-16 hours to fill.

Suggestions are welcome.

I guess I could start more actively job searching but that is for another post.

It's Official

I am moved into my parents house. All of my boxes are unpacked and my clothes are out of the laundry baskets and into drawers. The reality that this will be my room for the next year or so is starting to set in. Before now it was just like any other long weekend at my parents house: excited about my days in Aurora but ready to make my way back down I70 to Lawrence, the place I have loved to call my home. Sadly, Lawrence is not my home anymore. It is now just a place that I loved, a place where I grew into the person I am today and the place where I met so many life long friends. A very significant place.

Aurora will not be Lawrence, nor could it ever try but I am happy.

This is the first time I have been happy about where I am. My emotions in the last 5 or so months have gone a little something like this:

excited

anxious

confused

angry

sad

angry

indifferent

angry

accepting

happy

I am ready for what God has in store for me in Aurora and I am honestly happy that I am here.

Sweatin to the Oldies

If you don't know me well, I'm sure that my blog will show ou just how much of a Mamma's boy I am and how hilarious I think my mom is.

That being said, she is on this health kick. A new diet and a new determination to exercise.

Today she comes downstairs for lunch and tells me that after lunch she is planning on doing a Sweatin to the Oldies tape. Yes, that is a Richard Simmons original and yes, Suze asked me to join her. But she had to do it upstairs because its a VHS and the only VCR in our home resides in my parents bedroom.

I'm still unsure why I turned down this offer. It would have been half an hour full of pure entertainment. Maybe one of these days I will accompany her in a coreographed dance to oldies music lead by Richard Simmons but for now I'm gonna let her do her own thing.

Just Be A Dumb Sheep

Warning: I am in a Bible study on Tuesdays so Tuesday posts might be deeper than my average post.

I love this Bible study and its only the second week I've been there. It feels like high school in all the best ways but is so drastically different in even better ways. My YL leader, Sean, leads it and it is a group mostly comprised of friends from high school, instant community! The high school parallels stop there. For the most part all of us went to different colleges and have been apart for the last 5 or so years. In this time we have sought to follow Christ independently from one another and have developed a comfort in our faith that allows us to be truly open, vulnerable and honest. This is a level of friendship that few of us had in high school. It. Is. Awesome.

Tonight we talked about being a dumb sheep. Say it out loud, it sounds like I am telling you to be a dumb shit which was obviously the joke of the evening. Sean talked about how we have complicated Christianity with formulas (what kind of Church you go to, how you pray, how you worship, what Authors you're reading, etc.) and have lost sight of how beautifully simple it is to follow Christ.

We first read John 10:1-21. Jesus is talking about the sheep and their shepherd. A lot of times I read this and try to be the shepherd, taking other peoples burdens upon me and thinking I am called to be a shepherd. Jesus says "I am the good shepherd" twice. How did I read this and think I was anything in this story besides a dumb sheep.

We then talked about the characteristics of sheep. They are mostly dumb. They rely on the shepherd for everything. Food, water, protection, everything. Sheep will cast themselves or fall onto their backs and it is very difficult for them to get back up, sometimes it is impossible; they need a shepherd, someone who will take care of their every need and discipline them when they wander. But for how dumb sheep are, they can recognize voices. They know their shepherd's voice and will only respond to him/her.

Reading Psalm 23 concluded our time. This psalm came alive when I read it picturing myself as a dumb sheep. David speaks with a trust in the Lord that I want. Knowing that the Lord will make me rest, lead me to green pastures and will take me on a crazy journey but will always restore my soul.

Following Jesus is simple. Be a dumb sheep. One who relies on Jesus for everything. Know His voice and block out all others. But don't be fooled, simple does not mean easy.

I think I am going to get some sort of sheep (preferably stuffed) as a reminder that I might end up having a leadership position but I am called to be a dumb sheep and Jesus is my shepherd.

New Cell Phone!

Kinda.

So, in my experience with cell phones I have noticed that they aren't really made to last the entirety of a two year contract. My last phone was the Samsung Sway. It broke about every 4 months and this last month was no different. The screen went out and since there was water damage from a particularly violent thunderstorm this spring, all hope for a replacement was lost. I had to search my families stash of old phones for one that was least broken. I thank Suze for this gem which I now call my phone.

Yep, thats the Red (Pink in the light) Motorola Krzr. A phone that is way too cool for vowels. There is already a crack that runs through the front of the phone but it works fine. I am eligible for an upgrade in September and that is when Verizon is rumored to launch 4G. I can't wait to be that unemployed guy who is living with his parents but has a sweet new 4G smart phone.

Life in the Burbs

Since I now live in physical isolation from all of the people I love in Kansas and elsewhere, I figured it was time to create a blog so that these friends can keep up with my extravagant lifestyle. That and inspiration from Hattie

Speaking of extravagant, these are a few things I have realized during my short time back in Aurora:

1) My 5 years in college DID NOT prepare me for the real world. Seriously, I'm under qualified for every job I have applied for. My career really is dependent on Young Life or grad school.

2) There is no shame in telling people that I am an unemployed college grad living with my parents. Everyone I tell has either done that themselves or understands the nature of this economy. I just let them keep thinking that its the economy and not so much the first point.

3) I am more prideful than I had previously thought. I guess living with my older brother who currently doesn't have a degree or a license (second DUI) but has a job will do that to you.

4) Graduating college is not the milestone that stops your parents from speaking to you like you're in middle school. Maybe marriage? Dang, this might take a while.

I will try to update this thing daily but I make no promises. At this point, I have time to update it 20 times a day but I don't exactly have the content.